Super Jessie

A sad day

I'm staring at a picture of Watson right now, and it's of him when he was really small. It's so cute! I'll scan it another time...

Well, in the space of... four hours (?) I have done... nothing. Well, I went to the shop around the corner from me (yay for corner shops!) and bought six bars of chocolate called 'Freddos', and a packet of crinkly crisps. They're all gone now :( Watson kept attacking me for them- he really needs to improve his crisp-catching. I was ashamed. My old dog could catch almost anything in his mouth if he could be bothered. I really miss him. It's been about two years almost, since he died. I can still remember that day as clear as anything.

I was woken up about four in the morning by Dad, and I instantly knew there was something wrong, as you do when you're woken up at four in the morning. He said that Renduth (my dog) (it's a Scottish name) was acting strange and they thought something was really wrong. So I went downstairs where everyone was, and he was lying on his side panting hard and shaking and stuff. I just stood and looked at him and started crying. God, I'm crying right now as well, just thinking about it! We moved him onto his favourite rug, that we'd bought from Ikea (Ikea rocks) and he was still shuddering and stuff. At about six in the morning we phoned the vets and tried to carry him outside to go to the toilet but he just fell over. He was quite a large dog, and he had arthritus so it was bad for his legs, and they just crumbled. At about seven in the morning we decided to put Ren in the boot of our car and take him to the vets, so me and Chris got into the car, and then Mum and Dad carried him into the boot, and just as they layed him in the car he died.

It was so sad. I just sat and cried for hours. We took him to a pet crematorium, and they lay him on this giant metal tray, and I was asked if I wanted to see him go in, but I didn't, so me and Dad stayed outside of that horrible red room (apparently meant for consolation) while he was burned (watched by Chris, Alison and Mum).

We spent about two hours there, drinking lots of hot chocolate (just for the sake of it) and looking at all the gravestones. It was honestly the saddest day of my entire life.

I don't know why I just wrote about that. It might have something to do with not being happy with Watson. I love him and all, but he's just not the same as Renduth, and never will be. I can't blame him for not being Ren, but I like him less. I keep seeing bits of Renduth in him, and I keep hoping he'll kick up his heels like Ren did, and cock his leg like Ren (and other dogs) did. But then when I think about it, I don't want him to be like Renduth. I don't know what I want. I do actually- to have Renduth back; but that will never happen. C'est la vie.

There was an entry before this, which I want people to read- it has einen linkens to my pictures (Orlando and a piece of artwork I drew myself).

On a sombre note, bye. xxx

written on 2004-05-25@5:33 p.m.

before ||after